i lived in L.A. for 6 years and had a quite regular performance, for a performer. more of that at another time. my best income of my life i think (not saying much). i left that in great part to go home and be closer to my mother who's very sick.
when i moved back i didn't feel good for many reasons: it happened at an awful economic time so i was unemployed (doubly), had to stay with my parents for a bit. no heath insurance as usual. a good friend of mine said not to be hard on myself, it was a tough time.
a month after that i was in that same friends' family house. a joint celebration: his sister's 40th birthday, a friend of ours visiting from Nippon soon to have a kid, another friend with an adopted kid. i gave all these folks gifts though it wasn't required of course.
and in the course of that day, some of my old "friends', who i had seen only briefly since being back, decided to openly attack and belittle my old job, my politics, some old relationships of mine, (one of the attackers was one of the people for who's kid i bought a gift). they even attacked me when 'happy birthday' was sung--i hate the song, don't like singing it. i bought probably more gifts than anyone, but that counted for shit. i think the word to openly describe me was 'idiot' or 'stupid'.
but that wasn't the final home slice: that was from the first friend mentioned, the one who was giving me a break about living with my parents. i think a similar subject came up, how another friend of ours still does laundry at his parent's. and my good friend said, again openly, that 'at least he doesn't live with them.' slam, dah duh dah, let the boys be boys eh?
obviously the point: even if you're down on the ground, bleeding, dying, gasping for any help there, just keep in mind: even an Emperor was butchered by a crowd that was supposed to be closest to him. by a crowd, not by the cowardly lone gunman.
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