Shoveling out NY City

yeah im helping with that right now so im pretty tired and can't write much. Im doing it up in Wash heights. 


something i noticed: I live in Harlem and one of the stereotypes of blacks that's true: LOTS of barbershops. guess what: with Dominicans up in the Heights, just as true: LOADS of them! 

Good PArts about Snow

the song "Informer". just kidding, though i do like this song


this is mainly activities that us adults can still do. if there are more u can think of let me know

but ever green

• sledding
• using it to water plants (supposedly it has good minerals for them)
• eating falling snow flakes
• throwing snowballs at loved ones
• looking at the crystals, an the beauty of the virgin snow ("pure as the newly fallen snow")
• xercise thru shoveling
• doing donuts ("spinney spinneys" as a friend of mine wud call them) with a durable car
• ice skating, hockey, ice fishing, skiing, snow mobile and other winter sports  
• Winter scenes: woods, icicles, supposedly the Medieval Cloisters in upper Manhattan
• throwing bird seed on the white blanket: they really love it
• seeing the  snow fall
• good waters, minerals etc for our greenery, plants etc

the Birth of a Religion

as we all should know, the Christians took most of the traditions celebrated before them by Scandinavian pagans, Roman pagans etc and Incorporated (double meaning intended) into Christmas. most traditions were pre Christan: the tree, gifts, feast etc.

this time of year was the beginning of my entry towards Paganism in many ways. years ago  i started to wonder why a holiday like Christmas is celebrated like it is. why the tree, fire, incense etc.

i started to look into the origins of the holiday and others. i found that most holidays, especially American christian ones, have their roots (as far as the practices, celebrations) in pagan traditions.

Paganism started to make more sens to me, including practices like seeing the evergreen as a great symbol of the strong Earth (and the Solstice as the time of the  turn around of the SUn to stronger light), which led to stronger belief in the power of the Earth, environment etc. it meshed well with the facts of the strengths  of nature, the bounty of Earth etc.

and that's how much of it began for me. not with the birth of a a human savior, but in my mind,  great gods like the Earth and Sun, and ancestors that have given us all so much.

What Happens During Eclipses

I was at Columbia university the other night, one of the best places to see the eclipse in NY City.  i discovered that the AAA (not the car stuff, Amateur Astronomy association) gathered there that night to see it.

now i don't care how smarty pants ivy league Columbia is, you know how many of them there didn't know what the hell goes on during an eclipse? a lot. didn't know anything.

basically: an eclipse is like a shadow cast from Sun to other body. you ever hang in the shade? well that building, tree etc is eclipsing the Sun. by the way, notice that the shade isn't pitch black? similar principal to why the Moon isn't pitch black during the eclipse: there's still Sun shine around, just not as direct. same deal in space (you ever see a photo of a total solar eclipse? even though it's total, you still have to wear special glasses because of the overwhelming sunlight).

anyway in a lunar eclipse the Earth appears to cover the Sun and cast a shadow over the Moon. we see that shadow over the Moon. since the Earth is much bigger than the Moon, it's more likely to see a lunar eclipse than a solar, and over a greater area (like the whole moon)

in a solar eclipse, since the Moon is smaller, it casts a much smaller shadow over the earth, hence a smaller area gets a solar eclipse, and for a much shorter time, and there are more likely to be partial ones etc. from Earth, the Moon covers the Sun. during a lunar eclipse, from the Moon, the Earth covers the Sun.

so again that's what happens: a body covers another body in front of the Sun, and casts shadows.

Happy Winter Solstice

no it's not the first day of Winter. for those in NY this year especially, notice that on average the coldest days of the year start around the begin. of Dec. 


the Solstice is when the southern tropic, Capricorn, lines up directly with the Sun. so more day light in the Southern hemisphere, it's Summer etc. 


up here, since the Sun is lined up with the South, the Sun appears to us further south, less Sun, Winter. longer nights.


 that's what happens every year. 


on a spiritual note, a time of darkness yet introspection, spirituality. maybe a time to remember the spirits who have passed and give thanks. the spirits that have given, continue to give. 


also a time to look forward to the days getting longer from now til Summer Solstice. 

Eclipse near Solstice Tonight: Northernmost for Centuries

http://earthsky.org/tonight/total-lunar-eclipse-for-the-americas-on-night-of-december-2021

"On Every Block in NY" part 2

so what is on almost every block? well you're asking the right guy because i've been advertising around uptown at least (Upper west and east sides) lately, block by block. 

both neighborhoods: lots of nail /beauty salons, lots of dry cleaning. more laundromats in upper west. 

of course in all of NYCi think, bodegas pretty much every block. convenience, some food, soda, lotto etc. 

one interesting fold: on the Up. W side you'd think that there were as many animals as people (maybe it's a close count), there are so many pet stores: food, accessories, vets etc. huge amount of businesses. 

most likely restaurant, as expected maybe: pizza,  both areas. 

Rats Run 'ROund and 'ROund the Wheel of Fotune

is there any film that De niro won't do where he gets to play a cop or a gangster?


is there any film in the world,  especially comedies, that Will Farrell won't do?


is there any commercial that Peyton manning won't do? 
and is there any idiot that won't say that he's the best,  in spite of TOm Brady's 3 Super bowl  victories and Montana's 4 including 3 mvps? 


is there anyone else besides me that sees this as so obvious that you can't believe the blindness of everyone else??!! 


hope i didn't offend real rats or blind folk

"On Every Block in NY City" part 1

what's next to be nailed?

one time a friend had some profundity wannabe that i have a feeling he got form some jerk comedian, that held that  on every block in NYC is a gun store, an Off Track Betting, and some other vice related place i think, maybe a pawnshop but i wasn't paying attention by then. 


of course it was bullshit then (90s i think) and bullshit now: NY has always had strong gun laws believe it or not (supposedly our guns in crime come from states with weaker laws). 


and OTB wasn't hugely prevalent then, and it's i think completely gone recently. for better or worse. something that became a bit of an institution;  almost bitter sweet that it's bust now. as i've written before: in NYC, there's no such thing as too big to fail.


seems to have  come in continuation of  the NYC  war on vice: strip joints moved and closed, cigarettes taxes thru the roof, now the betting parlors. 

When You're Right (wing), You're Right! part 2

"no more body armor!"

when the left supports big business,  they're doing it with  bailouts,  socialism, etc. when the right wing supports corporations with tax breaks, trickle down economics etc,  it's good business, trickle down economics, "the business of this country is business" (Coolidge) 


when the  right invades nations under false pretenses, war profiteers, kills tens of thousands of innocents, and rips a nation apart, they're  spreading democracy, keeping the world safer ("the purpose of the war is peace"--GW Bush), keying in on American interests  


the right attacks a supposed enemy without direct provocation, under false pretenses, with overwhelming force. if one of us attacks someone we don't like without provocations, under false pretenses, with overwhelming force, we're  arrested. 


when anyone wants to mess with the military and keep excellent personnel out, they are seen as anti American, hurtful, not supporting our troops, putting them in harms way.  when the right excludes excellent gay personnel  from the military, they're etc. when the right keeps gays out of the military, they're   keeping morale high, not messing with the military, going with the wishes of our troops

WHy DO YOu Write Holiday Cards?

burn before sending 

 so that  u get them back? you write them only so that you get some sent to you that year?  i do season's greetings to catch up with folks i've lost touch with over the year, folks that have been good to me, etc. not to hang up cards at my home  (many of which are just cards and  not personal messages, updates etc). well i guess it's typical of the holidays: those who end up with the most materials win eh?


of course i hate cards in general. paying some stranger to write some stupid, unfunny, non genuine words with a lame piece of 'art', and substituting this for sentiment to the people you care of the most. and paying for it. 


 but are holiday cards the worst? sending them out of politeness is nice, but  obligatorily, to get return? 

Real 10 10 (10?) Today

December, supposed to be tenth month (dec like decade), tenth day. tenth year isn['t my deal either, 2010 a.d., anno Domini, year of our lord (their lord, christian).

day to use decimals, be with perfect 10s or at least read the mag (wink), watch 10, play 10s in lottery etc.

THoughts in the Crapper

the edge of tech

you love how now the toilet paper is encased in a big plastic round deal which makes me think that there's a wheel and a hamster inside it every time i reach in. it would be more efficient if they were there instead of having to reach 270 degrees in


where do you aim as a man when you piss? for the urinal, do you try to wear down the cake? for the toilet, do you do a rim shot, below the rim, or try to make lots of noises and splashes like ur in a kiddie pool? 


you're at a urinal with an automated flusher and a little red eye is watching you to see when you're done. you ever want to get in a  staring contest with it to see if it blinks and rushes you along before you're done? like a contest with the Hal 9000. 


in Cal especially we used to have these no water oil toilets. i kept thinking that we were supplying the vinegar in some gross golden shower dressing.


why do so many bring writing utensils that work to the toilets, yet there are never any at Dmv, the bank etc? 


you're  ever sitting  at an auto flush toilet and it does it's flourish before you're done, like it's saying "move it along! no loitering"

Loser Lamentations: Cold Cuts

 finally tossed out. on to the street.  happened.  cut off


 3rd time during the holidays. tis the season. money matters. "success" matters. the "successful" matter. smarts? no. talent? no. family? no. friend? no. 


Benefit cards. food stamps. cutting lines. stink. his world. 


poverty,  never surrender,;  despair, creation


New York City.  unusually cold.  below freezing.  wind and chill. of course bitter. walking the streets. up town. darker less visible. lots of pet stores, etc. they matter. 


north. west. victories? triumphs? matters? 

My Wild Irish Name

why do those who know my name turn into the Lucky Charms Leprechaun? 

Adult Men WITH Hats

why does tv want us to follow grown men wearing baseball hats--oops

Older Folk Noise

"damn kids!"

why do we have to "turn down that gal darn music" when we're with older folk in the car, restaurants,  even our homes,  yet when many of them watch TV, it's at overwhelmingly loud  noise levels?

Seasons of GIving and THanks

still in love 

im not sure about Thanksgiving being in late NOv, after so many harvest festivals that are in most of the Northern hemisphere,  Aug (Lughnassad), Harvest Moon, etc.

however it's perfect timing with gift giving of the Solstice (Xmas): at Thanksgiving, i begin to think about the year past, who has been nice not naughty, who i should maybe give a token (gift of appreciation) to, and you have a whole month to get it and give it. so good timing.

the Solstice makes sense in biological terms: times of darkness and cold, so  time to get together with folks, joy, gift giving etc. So looking backwards, Thanksgiving in late Nov makes sense.

is that how Lincoln et al decided upon it? don't know. also not sure if there is any history in it being at that time (Pilgrims etc). have a feeling  they did it nearer to more astronomical harvest times mentioned above.

Darker Holidays, (short) Text

Halloween: half way between Equinox (equal dark and night), and Solstice (darkest)= darker days= more spirituality begin. (begin. Celtic year, Samhain, All Souls, Christmas etc)

Thanksgiving: harvest, think of who to thank, what etc ur thankful for, non naughty/nice list, gifts at holidays

please go to below pod cast

Darker Holidays

Darker Holidays

click above, podcast

Really Odd Jobs

Really Odd Jobs

this is a continuation of an old blog entry, this is a podcast

THe Only Solid or Liquid that Travels Up?

capitalist vertigo 

if im not mistaken, money is the only one that travels up. 


you pay up with it. it flows up actually in trickle down economics where the people up top get paid first and most so that  Atlas doesn't shrug, before the money theoretically, and i emphasize that word, trickles down.


 the Fed, IRS, the big bureaucracies that take  out of your pay check before you even see it yourself. the ones who get executive bonuses in spite of government bailouts, lay offs, etc. 

Podcast? Youtube?

techno

been a litte slow on the writing  because it's  a bit of a time of transition. where im proud of my writing, blogging etc , i want to move on i think to some activities i want to do, and which can earn me more pay and notoriety   i hope.


 so i've looked into podcasting (for those who don't know, like an audio blog), since everyone says i should be in voice overs, radio etc, because of my face (beat you to it?) and of course i've been talking about filming and You tube etc, and may have a method there so we'll see. 


as usual your opinions, comments etc are welcome.


 again a time to figure what i want, how to go about it, best medium etc. what's great is that so much of it can be done at home on computer etc. and the equip for the most part isnt' expensive.  if anyone's interested let me know i can give you info. 

the Curious Case of Sergey Bubka, part 1

statue of Bubka

i used to be a huge sports fan and watch many of them avidly. now i pretty much stick with the major championships (one dayers pretty much): Super bowl and boxing championships (between really top fighters, not redundant weight classes). i still consider myself a bit of a historian though in sports and still read about  many of them. 


since i was in hs or so i was interested in the Soviet sports system mainly because they would wup our asses internationally in many sports. yes i know, drugs were probably more systematic there, but that wasnt' the whole picture. they had a great system, schools, methods which i've studied.  a lot to learn actually, they were actually years ahead of us in much research, for instance the emphasis on not just speed or strength, bu tboth pf them used together in an athlete, which is the key to so much athletic achievement (witness running, jumping, throwing etc). 


anyway i like to read about their dominant athletes. one of them is maybe the most dominant of all athletes in history, Sergey bubka, the pole vaulter. no  one was close to him during his career for the most part, and though he's been retired for years and track and field records  usually fall quick, i don't think anyone's close to him now as far as the heights he's cleared , world records etc. amazing athlete: fast, strong, so great as a craftsman with the pole. 


yet as dominant as he was, he still showed weaknesses in his career...

the Real 9 9

Fellini Schmellini

another day  that's supposed to be numerologically  interesting: November should be the 9th month, (Nov), today the 9th day. again counting months from the spring (Equinox) month, March, this holds true. 


so a day to listen to the Beatles: "One after 909", 'Revolution 9', a song where if you listen careful you can literally hear Yoko breaking up the Beatles (especially if you listen backwards).. also  i once came up with a tune in a dream, "9 for 9", about a guy so obsessed with his girlfriend's past 9 fuck buds  that he became a serial killer to gun them all down like an animal. so as you can see, it's a kids song!  


also: the musical 9 (based on Fellini's great film 8 1/2, which meant that it was his film number  8 1/2). 


also considered sort of a perfect number, where it's the trinity 3 times e.g. 


other uses http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/9_(number).

Coogan's Ultimate Bluff

bluffer and bluffer

well it;s finally gone: the "Polo grounds curse', 'another NY baseball curse', is lifted. the Giants of baseball won 5 championships in NY, in the old Polo grounds. since moving to SF in the 50s: 0, until now. 


the old Polo grounds was a  classic park, with championships in football, great boxing bouts, etc. but it proved that there's nothing too big to fail in NY and even when the Giants  were one of the best teams in the world, they didn't sell much. 


not much left from the old house except the stairs on the left. I think i wrote about this and displayed it before: it's this condemned, falling apart, awful stair way up the  bluff (Manhattan's spine as i call it). you literally have to climb around to get to the top. but it clearly displays an old remnant from the Giants, and yes this is how it still looks. . and it's right near where i live. on the site of the old field are pjs (projects, housing). supposedly inside they've marked  the site of around  where home plate was. gotta check it out. 


the Giants, after some 70 years of playing in NY, went on to 'Frisco (SF, they hate when u say that),  where even with players like Mays, Maricial, Mccovey, Bonds, Kent etc: no championships. . that finally ended the other night. 


so next year, are the Cubs the only ones left? 

TOnight RIght Will Be Wrong

best health care in world right (wing)? 

terrific. let;s see what happens

• when a semi segregationist like Rand Paul (nice name) wins a national office. Strom Thurmond resurrected (he is dead right?)
• how much the media will spout endlessly about the Tea party kicking ass (which is o.k, but the coverage of Obama in 2008 was liberal biased media im sure), even though the Democrats were close to winning the Senate by 9:30 pm Eastern time
• i wonder when everyone will realize that the Tea partiers are more affluent  than the average American and it may be that they just  want lower taxes for themselves, and couldn't  care less about less government when the gays become discriminated against or when they themselves  want the Constitutional right of freedom of religion abolished for Muslims 
• again we'll "see" how much the problems now have nothing to do with Bush and everything to do with Obama. oh i left (left!) out Clinton, everything bad now is his fault too. 
• when we again ignore facts like the ones that support state supported health care in Europe being  better than our "best system in America" that ranks 35th in the World Health Organization's rankings

Souls, Ancestors, the Season etc

world's best mausoleum

this time of year  obviously there's more darkness. we're past Equinox where the Equator  lines up with the Sun, and the Southern hemisphere is getting more Sun, us less. so this brings on Halloween. it roughly  marks the half way point between Equinox and Solstice, sort of the begin. of the darkest days of year, hence belief in the supernatural, the "other world" active and  coming to Earth, but also spirituall belief in contact respect, thanks etc for ancestral spirits. this continues on to the Solstice (Xmas etc). 


as usual with original Pagan holidays, the Christians "adopted' the holiday, probably couldn't and can't stamp it out, and turned it into their "all saints, souls" or whatever. thankfully it's survived as Halloween but of course much of the commercial  superficial aspects survive, less the spiritual with US (this is one case where our "invading' friends from down south, Mexicans, can help us maybe in learning to pay more respect to passed loved ones etc.)


as many of you know, i think there should be times to celebrate, remember, give thanks etc to our passed loved ones, and this is a major time for such practice, with the dark days, spend. time  indoors, spending the holidays  unfortunately without them.  i think it  should be a time to remember them, welcome them back to our souls (or minds at least). small sacrifice, small energies, large thanks, large respect. 

"Rocktober"

Lenin,  Lennon (born Oct)

 when i was younger  i listened to much too much classic rock (even when rap, pop, New wave etc were cutting edge), a lot of the stations used to love to promote "Rocktober" and i've always thought of  that this month.


as i learned more it did seem like  a time for '"revolution" kind of: i think the main Communist revolution in Russia was called the "oktober revolution' even though in our western calendars i think the date of ascension of Lenin etc was in Nov. some deal with the Eastern orthodox calendar or something made it Oct maybe. and one of the great Eisenstein's films was called October, or Ten Days that  Shook the World, about the revolution. 


it also always  seemed like a dark time where a lot of wildness could come out, hence Halloween (time when the supernatural forces were active on earth). and even the ubiquitous trees changed and shed, bared their hearts. 


  getting back to Rocktober, of course the coolest rock shirts were concert shirts that were black, featuring acts that actually looked like Halloween characters: Ozzy Osborne, Alice Cooper, Kiss. 


well i can't name many  rock bands or artists that are prominent right now, and im tired of a lot of classic rock,  but still, rock on all! 

Half, Monthly Birthdays

leftovers? 

wonder if many celebrate, note  these. i know whenever the day comes on the calendar that matches my actual birthday (the day's number, so let's say you're born the 11th, then the 11th of every month), i try to  keep it in mind: am i making progress? is the year wasted? etc. don't usually think of it much, i'm usually busy doing crap, but still. 


 i used d to list  goals etc every month and check them on that day. im not sure if it worked after a while so i got rid of it;. still have monthly goals though, to do lists etc so i guess it wasn't all in vain. 


of course it's another reason that the calendar year, Jan to Dec, is bs, in that it's not really the age of anything (the Earth's year is more precisely dated from Solstices and Equinoxes of course), except those born  around jan 1. it's almost just another  reminder, like a clock,  that time is passing by. we're  getting older etc. . but you can look at it in the converse: the calendar year is gone, but you have maybe  months left til you turn another year older. 

the NFL's other Pre- season

Lombardi trophy

take a look at the NFL's history.  the first half of the season VERY  often doesn't  mean much. you can have a team literally   lose half of those   games  and go on to the Super bowl. conversely you can have a team go 7-1, then not even make the playoffs, which has happened more often than most notice. . that's why i don't even pay attention to the first half:  there's a  damn good change it won't mean much t all in the end. 


but of course most fans do, since they love football so goddamn much. i've known fans that go nuts during the official pre- season games which mean even less.   but they love the games, the season, every official game,  like they mean everything. 


these are some reasons that football is so popular. ther's a game every season's weekend. then you have a whole frigging week for hype, armchair analysis, media attention, theories, arguments,  prediction, etc. so it really is as if  every week's a mini Super bowl. the fans eat it up, the media runs with  it up since it means more ratings/money etc, of course the teams eat it up though they complain about the media etc often, but really it's all a huge part of why they're paid so much. 

How to Make Women do ANYTHING: Make it "In Style"

this'll look great when she's old

you all know it's true. women will do anything if it's fashionable 

• remember when every one of them wore bell bottoms twice within about a quarter century! 
• now it's trendy  to de- forest your  puss  so much  that they look pre pubescent, which fortunately im into just kidding
• i remember when the only time you'd see or hear the word vagina was in a high school health book, then for a while, starting with that goddamn play that every famous chick had to put herself in,, you heard the friggin word in every sentence! killed the fun out of a highfalutin   dirty talk word
• they'll spend hundreds, thousands! on hand bags, jeans, all sorts of accessories 
• they'll dump a guy they "love" if he isn't keeping up with career, money, even if he can't buy them a nearly invisible non rare rock for her hand
• "ban the fur"  was in fashion, so not as much fur (when too far with banning it down there,  as mentioned above). but who cares about killing  cows, so everyone now has to  wear at least one pair of big leather boots 
• piercing  tongues, eyes,  navels, even clits
• tattoos of who  knows what which'll last forever
• tans that make you look orange and that will age your skin more than anything, literally

but it's all "in style" so you should mindlessly do it like cows to the slaughterhouse (literally) since   some idiot celebrity does it  or because Calvin Klein said so! 

again, they'll do anything trendy. so somehow we have to all conform and make 2 girl heterosexual 3 -somes in style (wink) 

Those that are Most Drawn to Me

the edge of...

 animals, kids, married women


animals and kids (what's the difference/ say the parents haha) actually aren't difference in a lot of ways about what they like.   their judgement is  very simple, yet i think appropriate: if you treat them well, with fun, care, they're drawn to you. treat an animal well with attention, treat a kid well with the same and  fun, they're drawn to you. they're not clouded by your status, income, socio economic level, differences between one another. those criteria are reserved for single women, fair weather friends, some family, assholes. 


now married women have different reasons, which i may have written about before. you see, their main priority when they're single  is taken care of, and no it's  some one to make them laugh or any of that other bullshit. their security is taken care of. their bills are paid. money is there. why do you think that just an engagement (entrance fee) costs 2 months pay  for a small (relatively) , almost invisible, non rare rock?  kids, car house, whatever, pretty much taken care of. that's taken care of.


 so when they're in wed LOCK, TIL DEATH,  that's when those  "likes" come out   that they all throw t around when they're single: , that they like funny guys, artistic guys, smart, whatever, that's when it comes true. 


so with me, the money, security etc isn't there. hence single women won't go near me, and im alone. but  the married women literally appear out of now where to me because their  money's taken care of, and I'm the man they used to talk of: funny, smart, etc. 


that's the way it is, that's the way i've experienced it REPEATEDLY: no one knows it better than me. no one. 

U.S. Foreign Policy's Infinity Loop

mission accomplished

presidents come and go, parties go to and from power,  times change, as do enemies and allies (see Saddam Hussein). some American policy seems to be perennial: 

• peace talks in middle east, Israelis, Palestinians etc. always attempted,  never successful  long term. wish it was  
• 'we'll get off our dependence on foreign oil". i think this one has been reiterated since Nixon
• America will  hold on to the world's largest nuclear weapon supply and then lead the chant  against any of their enemies (not their allies, no matter how militant: Pakistan, India, Israel,)  that even begin to make any kind of nuclear fuel
•  in the fashion of 1984 (Orwell and Reagan's) America will have an enemy, usually created by the Republicans and/or the media: Communism, the Soviets  (Reagan: "evil empire"), Japan (economic, 80s-90s), "Axis of Evil", "war on terror",  China (economic, not human rights). at the same time America will hold on to one of the biggest military empires in all times with troops in some 150 nations
• war is peace: preaching peace, delivering war: over 369 000 troops abroad, preemptive strikes, world's  largest arms supplier? and above actions.  
• Americans love a winner, including  war: we'll almost always  win short term, often lose long term (Vietnam, Iraq, Afghanistan)

Will.i.am Lowman

really need a break at times

im not sure how much i can write in the near future, for  a while. i need to find employment just to survive  and it's been pretty tough

• low paying, underpaying jobs
• scams for get rich quick:  wire  money back, or pay us hundreds and you'll get a job etc. the worst sociopaths, preying on the desperate
• Bolles, author of What Color is your parachute, a job hunting book: the worst part of not finding a job isn't the money, it's the lowering of self esteem. every one's winning, you're losing. 
• your "'friends" looking down on you, talking shit about you, judging you
• your family guilt tripping  you, saying that you shouldn't have let it go
• the embarrassment  of government assistance. 
• unhelpful job centers, 
• agencies reaping 40 percent of your pay
• the stifling of the knowledgeable, talented, smart, creative, unique
• everyone thinking they know the best way for you to proceed and nothing works
• seeing assholes, idiots, bums with jobs
• such is the Lowman: he knows it all,  everyone laughs at him, but he's really  not worth shit
• at least Miller's had wife, kids, house, car, mistress. right Biff? Cantstandya? Larry? funny: my father was a Salesman too. 

When You're Right (wing), You're Right!

middle of the road!

when the left protests, they're "unamerican"," unpatriotic", "fanatics"
when the right protests, they're "Americans exercising their freedom of speech", "frugal", "disappointed"


when there was bad news  in the 2000s, it was mainly Bill Clinton's fault
when bad news happens in the 2010s, it's mainly Obama's fault. 
 the right gives something like  AMNESTY  to the Bushes.


when the left want to have universal health care, they're "socialist", "big government"
when the right wants to make  abortion illegal  even for rape victims, they have "family values", "honor the sanctity of life" 


when the left increases taxes for the rich, balances the budget, stay relatively peaceful, govern over prosperity, they're "tax and spend democrats," "weak on foreign policy".
when the right wages 2 endless and illegal wars, lessens taxes for the rich, increase the deficit by unbelievable amounts, increase the amount of poor and uninsured, they're "patriots",  "real Americans", "strong on defense", "fiscally responsible" (!!!). 


and Republicans are going  to win seats back this Nov? 

A Visit to the Lower Manhattan Muslim Center Site

tolerance and equality, please

today, out of curiosity, finally.  


it is really close to the World trade center, i thought. but then i also thought about something more important: that Muslims died in the tragedy as well. 


talked to a cool cop that was stationed there. said they have to be around 24 hours now. but not much trouble since Sept 11. 


i think the deal that i feel worst about is the fact that the building, which housed a Burlington coat factory (holy ground!), is a nice,  old fashioned, i think neo Federalist style building.  i think a military guy is trying to get it on landmark status now (which im sure he would've  done if there were no Muslims moving in, and im sure he's not doing it to keep Muslims away!) 


old fashioned bigotry also  still runs in NYC though unfortunately, lately: literal  gay bashing (even in the STONEWALL INN and Chelsea recently!), immigrant bashing, and the above.  the first area settled by European colonialists, still bigoted after all these years. 

Steve Hawking, "God," Paganism

great god

Hawking backed up  why i follow science so fervently, and why that has led me to Paganism. i think his viewpoint  is that physics, creation, the cosmos, matter, life, energy,  death, etc has occurred greatly and vastly  in the Universe, probably always has, always will, and for those events, entities, evolutions etc, "God';, the "invisible man in the sky" master, doesn't have to exist. physics, science, evolution etc can happen without his "invisible hand". 


i realized the above at least in part  in my agnosticism, then my Paganism. that the world, Universe, Earth, Sun, were miraculous enough to worship without a ghost, a supernatural figure to guide them all. we realize that more and more now as more worlds, planets, stars etc are discovered. in my Paganism, the  deities are  the scientific  bodies that as a matter of fact create life: Sun, Earth (and probably more bodies). life is our greatest gift, and again we  do not see a need to worship the supernatural, invisible, theoretical, mythical, folkloric,  faith based. 


i have never claimed that science and/or paganism can explain everything, especially phenomenon like the  big bang, "in the beginning", is there an afterlife etc. but as the Pagan deities have given us so much, they are more than qualified to earn us our utmost worship, thanks, energies. 

Black Fruits

sounds like a special in a Chelsea buck house haha


today was in a NYC public sitting area, at Worldwide plaza. top 20 tallest in NY, duly noted. this one building actually has TWO Starbucks open  for the public, on street sides. used to have this cheapo cinema there for 3 bucks in the early 2000s, flicks and crowds of such trash   that even a poverty- stricken fuck  like me didn't go after a while.


 so was saying good bye to the blue sky. sunny Autumnal  day like Sept 11.  looking at the trees for nice  sturdy  branches and all. 


last night i finished that flick the “Good’" Girl.   don’t know why  "Good'  wasn’t in quotes, since i think it was supposed to be  ironic. this bitch tried to kill her lover, ratted him out where he later killed himself,  had his kid and had it raised by her husband amongst other sins. Of course it was played by Jennifer Anison, “American's sweethaeart’ (again note the quotes),   and she was a cute young  white woman, so i guess she was good ultimately, right?  

Anyway she  tried to kill her "love” (quotes again) with these supposedly rancid black berries. of course later in the decade (film was from 2002),   blackberry abuse was when you used your ostentatious phone too fucking much. but in the flick, literal death by blackberry.  i also thought  of MASH (the flick) when Painless wanted to kill himself for, of all things 70s, believing himself to be gay,  and the good doctors ceremoniously endow upon  him a placebo “black capsule’ (song, suicide  is painless) at his Last Supper.


  not  painless today, and after the trees, looked down,  and  at my sinister foot was a big black berry. looked up in the sheltering tree above me and there were no more. a tree of knowledge?  had to look at it,   give it some thought. had to. But was off after a while, and actually, really,   accidentally stepped on the it while i was turning to leave. 

The Untouchable Whose Name We Dare Not Utter

you have to wonder how little you're worth when the latest round of snub snobbery comes when  folks that  you know won't even introduce you to others out of politeness. 

popular exhibit uptown

today  i taped some fucking cabaret show for a girl who appeared in some films for me (porn, just kidding),  since i felt i owed her. in the end, no "thank you" announcement  (even the bartender got one), and no intro to any of her family, who she told me about at length. but  a blow off "we'll catch up  later". 

last night: a friend of a "friend" talked to me for a while with her boyfriend (they met thru E harmony--yes, she would rather date strangers on- line than even try it with me). had a nice little conversation. not even an attempt at introduction.

another friend of the same "friend" i recognized, talked to him, remembered so much about him that he couldn't believe it. again, not even an attempt to introduce me to his snobby looking bitch girl friend (for the record, my gaydar always goes  off with this guy, yet my "friend" says he fucks everyone. fucked me last night a bit didn't he). 

i shouldn't even mention that my "friend' didn't even attempt to include me with her "real friends".  probably all from MTV (like my 'friend'), chuckling about how America smokes up the brain tobacco they shit out on the TV. this is the same 'friend' that used to introduce me around, then consistently  put me down me later  (the fem friend cock block bitch  black hole, when you try to get with friends of  a 'friend' that thinks shit of you: maybe the worst block). we used to be at least "friends' on Facebook. now they don't even respond. like a preemptive  Israeli  strike .

nor did she when i asked her some TV advice. yet at  my big birthday recently (a number  with a 0 at the end), she shoved her fucking  vacation pics in my face, and  said to another  "friend" of mine that she would yenta  him up with a friend of hers (this  "friend' of mine 's mother died recently, the fem friend didn't even know about  it. real close eh? ). she also  bragged to my face about herself that she is  one of the most "successful" people in her class. 

did  i mention before that of all the shit that sucks when you're "poor", your "friends" being assholes is maybe the worst of it? 


when you want to get out, circulate, socialize, and the Job's comfort that they give is but torture (i mean "enhanced socializing"). 

Loser Lamentations

darkness inevitable? 

meant to not be? 


no where (man)


no one


me? please


darker than black? 


beyond? 


you are what to everyone?


you are? 


days, nights, dark swamp march


trail of descent


long long low low


forget? 


done  with"dignity"?


"you are what you're worth"


plenty o nuttin